I was talking with a client recently who was wondering out loud if she was really worth her salt. “What if I can’t help this client? What if they realize I don’t have an advanced degree? Do I really have something of value to offer? Why would anyone buy a book that I write? I’ve only been doing this a few years.”
This woman had what I call “But It’s Just Me” Syndrome. In other words, she was thinking: When will they find out I’m a fake – it’s just little ole’ me?
You’ve no doubt felt at least a tinge of overwhelm as summer is drawing to a close. It’s back to school, back to the big projects at work, and back to life as we know it. And, dare I say it, stores have even begun busting out their holiday merchandise! Talk about pressure!
Fall is quite possibly the most stressful time of the year for adults with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). You may even find yourself slipping away from the ADD management routines, structure, and systems that you’ve previously created.
I’ve been hearing from a lot of clients who are getting down on themselves because the transition from summer to fall has been more difficult than they anticipated.
With this in mind, I’d like to offer you the following reminder: Managing adult ADD is like riding a bike.
Remember when you learned to ride a bike?
By Michael Redbourn
Doing A Job That You Hate Is Like Going To Prison
There are a huge number of people that really dislike their jobs and when they get up in the morning and head for their workplace, they feel like they’re going to be incarcerated for the next several hours, which in a sense they are.
Why Do People Hate Their Jobs?
By Edward Hope
A speech can be interesting, informative and highly entertaining without being humorous. Most speakers are invited because they are well informed on a specific subject and it is of interest to the audience, the listeners do not necessarily expect to be entertained. For entertainment they would hire an entertainer. However, humor has a number of great benefits in helping the speaker to be more effective in achieving the overall purpose of their speech.
The advantages of using humor in your speech are: -
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When was the last time you heard someone talking about the proverbial “next level” in their business? Probably in the last 24 hours! Well, I don’t know about you… but I’m a little tired of hearing this phrase over and over again.
When I was in Las Vegas recently with my mastermind colleagues, we originally thought we were there to take our businesses to the “next level.” After all, isn’t that what mastermind groups are all about? Progress in your business! But, I soon began to notice something each time a colleague stood in front of the room to share… the realization of which leads me to third gift I received in Las Vegas.
Ever have a problem or challenge that you just can’t seem to solve? Perhaps you’ve stewed over it a while, tried to force a solution, and gotten frustrated in the process? You toiled away for hours or days on end to no avail. Then, all of a sudden out of nowhere an idea comes to you when you least expect it – in the shower, taking a walk, shopping for groceries.
We’ve all had this experience. I know myself in my many years doing computer programming I might hit a snag and then go absolutely insane trying to find a problem. I would toil, curse, scream, and rip my hair out and not be able to solve it. Then, if I walked away from it or simply asked someone with a fresh set of eyes to look at it – boom – there is a simple answer and the problem gets solved in a matter of minutes the path forward gets clear in an instant.
What if you could tap into this ease and power from the get go? Continue reading
By Anthony K Wilson Sr
Being a good person is not about doing the right thing because someone else is watching you, it is about always doing the right thing because YOU are watching. You must have that litmus test within your own soul that governs your ability to operate at a level that cannot be altered by the simple thrill of any unethical enticement.
Sometimes it is very easy to do the right thing. If you believe you will get some kind of credit or reward, for example, doing what is right comes quite easily. It is also not very difficult to do what is right if you are afraid that there may be negative consequences to doing something wrong.
Integrity is different. When you have a good sense of integrity, and allow it to be the leading force in your daily life, you will do the right thing simply because it is the right thing to do. Instead of fearing the consequences of doing wrong, your own conscience will dictate that stronger drive of how much better the right thing feels to your spirit. You will not need rewards or praises, because how you feel about yourself is a wonderful reward in itself.
It should be easy to see how important integrity is in your life. It is also strongly related to how you get along with other people. When you are known to others as a person of good character who can always be trusted to do the right thing, your integrity will help other people respect you. It will enrich your relationships with the people who are in your life, and lead you to have a good reputation even amongst those who do not know you well.
When you live your life with integrity, you will also be a positive example, especially for younger people. They will know that you can be counted on to do the right thing, and they will want to be the same way. Children can learn how to be trustworthy by observing your behavior.
A strong sense of integrity will benefit you, also. When you let your conscience guide you to do the right thing in all situations, you will feel good about yourself. Even more important, you will have earned the pride that you feel. Instead of waiting for an opportunity to do the right thing, if you really think about it there are many such opportunities in your life every day. When your conscience is more important than fear or rewards, your integrity will be one of the best parts of your life.
Anthony is an accomplished writer, author, painter, sculptor, artist, entrepreneur, and motivational speaker; he is passionate about empowering everyone he encounters with the necessary information on finding and embracing their creative life purpose. Anthony K. Wilson, Sr. is the owner of http://create-sun.com
What is success? The answer to that question is both personal and institutional for those of us who work in the business world. In essence, success is the ability to accomplish the task at hand. Technically, it is “to achieve one’s aim to prosper”.
You need thriving business relationships to prosper. In fact, we can measure much of our business success in terms of the viability of business relationships. Relationship health is directly affected by the quality of communication. Use the following steps to achieve communication success and to strengthen your critical business relationships.
Step 1: Identify a few communication weaknesses.
Can you think of any communication challenges that you face? It’s time to brainstorm and quickly make a written list.
Here are a few questions to get you thinking about your own communication challenges: * Are your employees happy and satisfied? * Are your clients glad to provide referrals? * Are your partners and stakeholders well-informed and confident? * Do you feel motivated and inspired? * Do your conversations flow?
As you review the bulleted list above and consider your communication challenges, identify each challenge but don’t get bogged down with other details.
Step 2: Decide to address the most bothersome communication weakness.
This choice is yours to make. However, whatever challenge you choose, you will find that the other relationships are naturally strengthened as you develop proactive and positive communication skills. You do not have to fix everything at once in order to benefit from this exercise!
Now that you have selected your challenge, it’s time to stop and think about what makes it so challenging. In other words, if success was easy you wouldn’t be working on this right now. Many leadership or business management challenges are a result of busy-ness. Leaders don’t realize that others need communication that is: * Professional * Complete * Positive * Concise, and * Wholly relevant without any irrelevance
If you are a leader or a manager, communication is your job. People expect you to do it and do it well. The responsibility for communicating is yours. It would be literally impossible for others to compensate for your poor attention to communication.
In spite of the advice of gurus world-wide, there seems to be a reluctance to buy into this idea. We all want to believe that we can just do our jobs well and receive the kudos. We want to believe that we are responsible for our own success. The truth of the matter is that most of us will be hindered, more or less, when we ignore communication or become passive.
Communication may not come naturally, and you may need to work on it. Communication brings power to your professional and personal life. Critical relationships can thrive with your attention.
To gain an understanding of how to resolve the weakness, you need to look at your communication patterns. You will develop communication that is regular and has flow. Communication, however, is not just about giving out messages. Communication is listening and speaking, receiving messages and conveying messages. Typically, listening is the thing that gets us into trouble. We don’t do it.
Step 3: Listen to others for a week.
I know you’re grumbling! Is a week really necessary? Yes. We’re not just talking about passive listening either; you will ingeniously create opportunities for listening. Listening must be practiced, and acting on incomplete information may be more harmful than doing nothing.
Consider how long you have been without the power of listening, and realize that a week is a small price to pay. While you are listening, you are reserving judgment and allowing the answers to come to you. Others often already know where the problem lies. They may even have ideas as to how you can fix the problem. Active listening requires practice, so be patient.
You may politely and nonchalantly ask for input during this time, but keep things casual and neutral by not being too intense and by refusing to form or give your opinion. This gives others the freedom to develop their thoughts and express them without disagreeing with you. Be sure to take notes on potential solutions.
Step 4: Define success and the benefits in this area.
After a week, you will probably have many ideas about how you could move forward. First, take a moment to define your ideal outcome. This is your defined target. You may not feel that you can make the mark on the first try. However, you need to choose to believe that success is possible and likely, and that you will have a reasonably positive response to your efforts. Your attitude affects your motivation and your outcome.
In addition, think about what benefits you hope to achieve. How would life or business be better as a result of your desired outcome?
You are painting the picture of what you’d like to see. For example, “Our clients know that we value their relationship as well as their business. We don’t tell them this; we show them. Every call is answered in a polite manner. Each concern is personally addressed. We listen when they speak. We thank them for their input. We keep them informed of new products and company news. We are considerate in our pricing. We thank them for each purchase. In return, they have no interest in checking out other providers, and they remain loyal in spite of the efforts of our strong competitors. We have steady growth in our revenue.”
Step 5: Make your proactive communication plan, being sure to establish checkpoints.
This plan will come out of your definition of success and your listening activities. Some examples of proactive communication would be providing customer service seminars for your employees, taking on a visible role that reaffirms your commitment to personal service, starting a service blog discussing best practices, scheduling individual meetings to check in with employees, or establishing standards of excellence and rewarding employees who excel or improve. Notice that these items are not remedial. You are not resolving past problems, but establishing a firm foundation for the future.
Also notice that you would choose one activity to plan. For example, if you choose to focus on a customer service seminar, you will define the necessary tasks and place those tasks in your planner. Choose your communication activity based upon whether you need a long-term or short-term effort. Also, consider the availability of resources and plan accordingly.
You may have to practice needed skills. For instance, if you are planning to present a customer service seminar yourself instead of outsourcing, you may need to schedule time to develop your presentation skills. If you are nervous about your skills in an area, practice those skills until you become calmly confident.
Step 6: Implement your plan.
Implement your plan, keeping your ideal outcome in mind as you go. Review checkpoints frequently to ensure that you are on track. Involve others in the plans when possible, or have an accountability partner. As things fall into place, you may be surprised at how well everything is going! Once your activity is complete or the communication fix is in place, it’s time to take a realistic look at what you’ve accomplished.
Step 7: Evaluate the results.
Congratulations! How did you do? If you look at your definition from Step 4, you will be reminded of the gains have you have achieved. You may also note unforeseen obstacles that you overcame. Remember to thank those who helped you along the way, and make sure to reward yourself for your efforts.
Now you’ve seen the power of communication at work. Communicating will become easy (or easier) as you go through the 7 Steps to Business Communication Success again. Communication is the key to your success.
Realizing your vision is not only possible, with these techniques it is non stoppable. Visualizing works. Start the process of visualizing what you want. Begin with the firm conviction that it will work. Don’t let fear and doubt creep into the process, hold firm to your vision. Believe it. It will come to pass.
Bo Bennett: “Visualization is daydreaming with a purpose.”
Let’s imagine you’ve just completed building a custom home on a beautiful lot. Now it’s time to put in the landscaping and decorate the interior. Imagine this custom home is your life. You’ve just created a blueprint for your life (house). You’re at the fun point in the process where you get to add the extras, the frills, the landscaping and the decorating that make your house your home. Often when people reach this point, they simply hire a decorator and a landscaper. They never experience the joy and fulfillment of visualizing, affirming and realizing the creative process for themselves. How sad.
It’s okay to hire the landscaper and the decorator to complete the work, but please give these professionals your ideas of what you want the finished product to look like. First you must visualize what would be pleasing to you.
Robert Collier: “See things as you would have them be instead of as they are.”
Go to a quiet place, close your eyes, and begin visualizing the yard: Where are the flowers? What color are they? Is there a waterfall? Are there stone pathways? Are there trellaces near the porch? Any shade trees? What do you see? See it all in vivid detail; as much us possible expand and stretch your visualization. The more detailed your visualization the more readily it will manifest in your life. You’ve created a blueprint for your life and now you are adding the fluff, the fun stuff. Can you see it?
The Keys to Perfecting Visualization:
1. Learn to see
Go somewhere where you will not be disturbed, get quiet by breathing deeply, close your eyes and bring up a visual picture of yourself. Where are you? What are you doing? What would you like to be doing? See yourself and your perfect surroundings. Visual in great detail, see specifically, don’t limit your visualization. Give your subconscious mind a vivid picture of how you want your life to be. Cherie Carter-Scott: “By Visualizing the impossible you begin to see the possible”
Start building a new idea in you mind. Hold the picture let it expand and grow. See it become a concrete form. Remember fantasies are dress rehearsals. Every thing that happens begins with imagination like a nudge from the super conscious mind.
2. Put the details in what you see
If you see the ocean, what color is it, are the waves rolling or crashing? Are you in the water or on the shore? Can you feel the ocean spray? Put in every bit of information that you can. Be specific and clear. Red flowers or pink? Deep green lawn or a lighter shade of green? Cyprus or Pine trees? Say to your subconscious mind, this is what I want. Your subconscious Genie will begin creating what you visualize. Jung: “Without this playing of fantasy, no creative work has ever yet come to birth, the debt we owe to the play of imagination is incalculable.”
3. See the finished product and believe in what you see.
To have the visualization manifest in your life it is imperative that you visualize the idea with crystal clarity. Really see what you want. Have a mental image so sharp that you can see it, feel it, taste it, hear it. The degree of intensity you give your subconscious mind will bring your visualization into your life faster.
Do not allow worry thoughts such as: How much will it cost? Do I know how to do this? Other fears Negative fear thoughts are mortal enemies of productive visualization. Your subconscious mind can not create if you’re sending it conflicting messages.
As soon as you have a this clear picture of how you want your life to be, when you know it is a possibility then and only then are you ready to affirm, make an action plan and move forth.
Through visualization you train your subconscious mind. Peak performers, champions mentally rehearse with visualization. Those that practice with visualization probably perform better than those who use steroids. Unknown: “People who soar are those who refuse to sit back and wish things were different.”
The secret keys to visualizing anything are:
1. Visualize in a quiet place, do not let doubts and negativity creep into your visualization.
2. Visualize in extreme detail. See even the smallest of details.
3. Visualize the completed scene. Then turn it over to the subconscious mind.
Copyright © Wee Dilts 2009