Tag Archives: focus

Overcoming Obstacles to Success: Increasing Your Possibility Quotient

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by Dinyah Rein

693590_inside_the_flower_3 “I can’t do that.” “That will never happen.” “It’s just not possible, or at least, it’s certainly not likely.” “It would be way too hard.”

How often do you give up on a dream, or a desire, or an idea, deciding it’s not possible before you even try? When was the last time you truly broke the mold and stepped into a whole new reality?

Let Yourself Dream

Close your eyes for a minute, and ask yourself, “What would I love to be, do or have in my life?” What’s there when you look? Can you allow yourself to dream? Is there a career you’d rather be in? Would you love to travel? Would you rather live in a different location, maybe a different climate? Do you wish you had more time for some of the things you love to do?

For most children, the sky is the limit. Anything is possible. Just ask, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” and you’ll hear all the big dreams an unlimited self can dream. So what happened? Why is it that by the time you reached adulthood that space of possibility is gone, and the window on what’s possible shows such a narrow sliver?

The Power of What You Tell Yourself

Your sense of what’s possible, what could happen in your life, operates much like a thermostat. Decisions and life experiences as you were growing up helped to set that thermostat. Just like the thermostat in your home that helps maintain your temperature, you have a system within you that regulates what you can see as possible, what appears to be within your reach in life. Your self-talk is a part of that system. It helps to maintain the status quo, or homeostasis in the level or type of success you experience, and expect.

When you tell yourself something, like, “I can’t do that,” you are literally programming your subconscious mind. The subconscious is a kind of supercomputer, with tremendous capabilities, but no decision-making power, no ability to make what we think of as choices. So when you tell your subconscious, “I can’t do that,” it doesn’t argue, it doesn’t interpret, it just makes sure that you can’t – it literally does what you program in.

Choice is the responsibility of your conscious mind. Your conscious mind can break out of the programming, and want something new, something different. Your conscious mind can dream up new possibilities. Unfortunately, your conscious mind is not nearly as powerful as your subconscious. The subconscious is the supercomputer. It runs all the physical systems of your body. It’s the part that learned to drive, and can do it without any conscious attention from you.

Your conscious mind has a much smaller role. It thinks, plans, dreams, chooses. It can only focus on one thing at a time, while your subconscious can handle literally thousands of simultaneous functions.

Your conscious mind is only in charge about 5-10% of the time, according to the scientists. This is why changing a habitual behavior can be such a struggle. You can decide to do something new or different, but then the conscious mind goes on to other things, and the subconscious takes over. Your subconscious runs programs that were previously installed. It doesn’t pay much attention to a one-time new command. That new command is overridden by the tried and true programs already in operation.

Reset Your Possibility “Thermostat”

So how do you change your set point for possibility? How do you allow yourself to dream, and how can you open and allow your dreams to flourish, take life, and become your reality?

One essential key is to change your self-talk. Stop reinforcing the old computer programming. Start to become aware of the self-limiting self-talk, and each time you notice, change it. Here are some suggestions:

“I can’t” -> “I could”

“It’s not possible” -> “I wonder how”

“It’s too hard” -> “How could I”

“I have to” -> “I could choose to….., or I could…”

Another key is to breath some life into what you truly want, into your dreams, by creating goals and revisiting them daily. Look out into your future, and allow yourself to envision how you want your life to be – in 6 months, a year, 5 years. Write it. Picture it in your mind. Feel how you will feel when it’s reality.

To reprogram your subconscious mind, you need to imprint new habits, and erase or write over the old ones. Consciously altering your self-talk as much as you can (whenever you notice) and consciously focusing on a future of your choosing are two keys to this process.

The best time to start this process? Right now! What are you telling yourself about these suggestions? How about, “I can do this! I’m starting right now! This will make a big difference for me!”

Good luck with it! Let me know how it goes.

Dinyah Rein has been coaching people to win at their personal and life goals for more than 25 years. Learn how to succeed with your personal goals, download her free audio now at http://www.coachdinyah.com.

Five Sure Fire Ways to Experience Success

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I talk with a lot of entrepreneurs every week, and I have discovered some common themes that make them successful. Combining these with my own experiences, I’ve uncovered five main ways to keep you on track for success.

Follow Your Passion

It is not enough to want your own business. You must find the business that you are passionate about! Your business must be in alignment with your personal goals, values and passion. When I was growing up, I was heavily involved in theatre and dancing. I toyed with the idea of obtaining a degree in musical theatre and moving to New York to pursue a career on Broadway. However, I was cautioned not to do this unless I was wildly passionate about it because the rejection was so incredible and the industry was so competitive. Do these obstacles sound familiar? They are very similar to those experienced by entrepreneurs. However, when you do something that you are truly passionate about, it’s easy to get out of bed and feel excited and energized by your work! In addition, it is much easier to find ways to stand out in a competitive market and to do great work for your clients.

Have a Vision

In business, it is critical to pay attention to the right details. Planning is crucial to success. It’s a well-known axiom that if you fail to plan, you plan to fail, and yet I regularly hear from entrepreneurs who do not plan! Without a plan in place, it is too easy to get distracted by whatever happens to come your way. If the opportunities (seminars, speaking engagements, networking opportunities, article requests, etc) are not in alignment with your vision, they will take you off course, and you may not meet your end goal and your vision will become, well… blurred! Think about this before you say “yes” to the next thing that comes your way. If it is not going to help support your goals for this year, month, or week, your decision should be very easy. Just say no.

Find a Way to Be Held Accountable

Many of us go into business to be able to flex our creative muscle. We like coming up with wonderful ideas, but implementing them is not as fun as the big-picture thinking! Our new idea sounds great, and the potential revenue is exciting, but the tasks we need to do to get there are overwhelming and we can’t seem to make any headway on the project! So we procrastinate and find other things to occupy our time, until we eventually take the wonderful creative idea off our “to do” list because we don’t want to or know how to do the work to get us there. This is a waste of your creative spirit! Successful entrepreneurs find ways to be held accountable, whether it’s through membership in a round table or mastermind group, forming an advisory board, entering a formal partnership or hiring a coach to keep them on track.

Spend Your Time on High-Payoff Tasks

Everyone knows that in order to stay in business, we must continue to bring in revenue. However, many entrepreneurs spend too much of their time doing activities that don’t generate income! So what is an entrepreneur to do? Delegate! By outsourcing all the tasks that don’t include generating money or building relationships, you will be able to use your newly found time to make more money! Your time for high-payoff activities (planning, forecasting, developing your marketing funnel, training, and so forth) will increase and in turn, your productivity will increase. There are many virtual professionals who you can hire to do the work you need to outsource and could include anything from accounting to administration and beyond. Once you do this the first time, be prepared to be addicted to this concept!

Focus

How many projects do you have going on at any one time? Or worse, how many businesses are you running at one time? I recently met a woman who has three businesses, and she was complaining that none of them were doing well. Gee, I wonder why? Having too many projects at one time, particularly if you do not have a way of managing each of them properly, means that you’re likely to become overwhelmed. Pick a project or two and focus on those. You will feel so great to knock something out and will be motivated to continue onto your next task. If you are spread too thin, I can guarantee you that you will sabotage your chances of meeting your goals.

After assessing where you are in these five lessons, you can start to see what you need to focus on. Whether you feel confused, struggle with self-confidence or lack tangible results, I suggest taking action to find out if you’re following your passion and determine your measuring stick for success. If you are easily distracted or overwhelmed, I suggest finding a coach who can help you align your goals, priorities and values to create the life and business you desire. By paying attention to these key areas, you can start to shift to creating a business that fits your lifestyle, not one that dictates it, which is one of my personal measures of success.

Copyright © 2009 Meredith Liepelt

Meredith Liepelt, President of Rich Life Marketing, publishes Smart Marketing, a free bi-weekly ezine featuring marketing tips, insider secrets and thought provoking articles designed to help the busy female entrepreneur become known as an expert in her field, build trust with clients and prospects and generate more income than ever before. Claim your free subscription today at http://www.richlifemarketing.com

Listening to YourSELF

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There’s been something missing from the business success principles that have been taught for decades. When you’re on a path of growth and expansion in your business, the strategies, tactics and principles you learn are only HALF of what you need to know. I’m sure you’ve been to many seminars, read lots of books and researched online to learn how to market your business, use social media, create information products, leverage multiple streams of income, hire a team, create systems, increase your fees, do joint ventures, create events, etc.

I’ve done the same thing. I’ve invested more money than I care to admit to learn how to grow my business. And, I grew my business to a point that many would consider incredibly successful. But, what I didn’t realize is that I was growing the business on a cracked foundation. Why? Because I listened to others more than I listened to myself. I tried to model others, more than I created a unique model that worked for me. I did what I thought I should do rather than what was 100% right for me and my life. I allowed some of my decisions to be made from my ego, rather than my heart.

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How Great Are You?

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I was talking with a client recently who was wondering out loud if she was really worth her salt. “What if I can’t help this client? What if they realize I don’t have an advanced degree? Do I really have something of value to offer? Why would anyone buy a book that I write? I’ve only been doing this a few years.”

This woman had what I call “But It’s Just Me” Syndrome. In other words, she was thinking: When will they find out I’m a fake – it’s just little ole’ me?

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3 Learning Tips to Learn Faster and Improve Memory

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By Andre Auerbach

Every time you perform an activity you’ve done before… every time you think a thought that passed though your time before, you’re strengthening synapses in your brain.

These synapses create a cause-and-effect relationship between the neurons they linked. So that every time one neuron fires, the other will too. These synapses are like a bridge that connects two neurons so that signals between them may pass.

So what has this got to do with your learning and memory?

Well, these synapses are what’s responsible for your them. The more you learn the more synapses you grow and the stronger these synapses are, the better your memory is.

In this article, I will introduce you to three laws of building and strengthening synapses. Master and implement these laws and you’ll no doubt see a marked improvement in not just your learning and memory, but also overall brain function.

1. Law of association. When you learn, you learn through associations, building above what you have known to make sense of the unknown.

For example, when I explained the concept of synapses, I use the terms “relationships” and “bridge”. You’re, of course, familiar with these terms. Thus you use what are already familiar to make sense of the unknown.

Fundamentally, this is how we learn without going through an experience. This is how babies. Contrary to popular belief, we are born with certain skills and knowledge. We know how to cry when we face certain stimulus (such as hunger and discomfort), we know how to move, we know how to recognize faces. These are the basic knowledge that we all have and we build upon as we grow up.

Thus when you learn, it is often far easier to associate what you learn with what you’ve already known. You may have trouble remembering a phone number, but if you associate that number with a date and age, such as 04-08-2012 78 instead of 0408201278, then it is far easier for you to remember that number.

This is because when you remember obscure facts, memory is placed in your short-term memory. Only when intense attention is paid and constant reminder is acquired that it starts to be moved. By associating with current fats, you can almost immediately build off long term memory.


2. Law of repetition. Practice makes perfect. This is true for anything you want to learn and remember. This is because every time you practice, you’re strengthening the synapses between the neurons involved in that activity.

I can remember how clumsy I was when I first typed on a keyboard. Now I could type without looking at the keys. But if I were to change keyboards, again I would have to look at the keys and learn its distance.

This is the law of repetition at work. The good news is, only 2 hours of focused practice is required for you to maintain and remember a skill. In fact, if you spend long hours of practice only to stop later, the skills you’ve picked up at that time will fade as synapses break down.

If you want to remember what you learn, it is better that you take a more habitual approach.

3. Law of attention. Michael Merzenich, one of the world’s leading neuro-plasticity scientists observed through brain scans that neural network responsible for learning only grow when attention is paid onto the stimulus.

This is why multitasking is detrimental to learning. When you multitask, you cannot focus – thus you cannot learn. It amazes me how students attempt to study for exams while listening to music and have their chat browser open.

It is a biological impossibility.

At the same time, multitasking at work yields the same result. When you should be able to learn from an experience that you have, multitasking robs you of that opportunity.

Did you know that multitasking lowers IQ by 10 points (more than what smoking pot would) and increases stress (which in turn makes the brain release chemicals that kills brain cells)?

To learn and remember, all you have to do is focus on the stimulus, for a short period of time. 2 – 3 hours a day is normally sufficient.

If you would to learn more about brain fitness, simply visit Andre Auerbach’s website, “Brain Training Made Easy” for more articles on brain exercises, improving memory and learning.

Want to be a Success? Change Your Life

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Is there some aspect of you or your life with which you’re not happy? Are you having difficulty achieving the kind of success you would really like to achieve – whether that’s in business, your career or your personal or sporting life? In other words, would you like to be e bigger success than you are at present? Well, if you want to be successful and happy, you’re going to have to change your behaviour. You’re going to have to take new action. As a client said to me recently, “I decided that, if I wanted to change my life, I had to change my life!”

Let me explain. I first met Billy three years ago. At the time, he was seriously stressed about his job, he suffered from chronic lower back pain, was constantly tired and, as a result, his home life was, to say the very least, less than satisfactory. More recently, Billy spent three days with me in my part of the world, the French Alps. It was the fourth time we’d worked together in three years. In those three years, he’d been promoted to what would potentially be an even more stressful job – right at the very top of his organization. His back problems had vanished and, in fact, he told me he could now do thirty minutes on his local gym’s rowing machine, a couple of times a week – beforehand, he couldn’t even bend down to sit on the rowing machine. He’d also just booked a three week holiday for himself and his family, having spent ten days on holiday at Easter – he, his wife and children were having a great time.

When we first met, I had explained to Billy that the normal adult mind is in constant turmoil – it is “entertained” by roughly 50,000 random thoughts each day. You know the kind of useless stuff – “I wish this guy would hurry up or I’ll be late for my next meeting!” “I wish I was on the beach, instead of the office, it’s such a lovely day!” “I don’t know if I unplugged the toaster!” “I really am too shy to walk up to that guy and say what I feel!” And, the ones that wake you at four o’clock in the morning “What if I don’t get that sale, will I be out of a job, will I lose my house, what will happen the kids?” (‘Cos the ones at four o’clock in the morning often take us on a train of thought to imaginary ruin – more like an express train to hell!).


I also explained that Billy’s subconscious mind was even more distracted – it’s just that, because it’s subconscious, he’d never be aware of the fact that, like all normal adults, his subconscious mind was incapable of paying attention to the here and now, the task in hand, obsessed, as it was, by his childhood conditioning, the snapshots of his formative years which all normal minds dwell on subconsciously. As a result, it was little wonder that he was stressed – the World Health Organization believes stress will be the biggest killer of the 21st century. It was little wonder that he’d been crucified by lower back pain for years – your mental state is at the root of most, if not all, physical illness. And, certainly, you wouldn’t have to be a genius to work out why his home life was spinning out of control.

But Billy not only understood, as most of my clients do, the importance of changing his mind – he actually put it into daily practice – hence, the results that he could so excitedly tell me about. Billy and I worked together to enable him stop the random noise in his head, to enable him calm his mind. Most importantly, Billy practiced and learned how to pay more of his attention to the here and now, dragging his subconscious mind’s attention away from the past and enabling him be more focused on the task in hand. Billy understood that, when you’re more present, you have more presence and that makes you more impressive to the normal people around you. As a result, he’d been handpicked for his new corporate role – without even realising that he might have been in the running – he was more focused on doing just what he was supposed to be doing.

In short, Billy learned how to meditate. And it made such a practical difference in his life that he committed not just to doing it every day – but to doing it for one hour solid every morning. He told me that he realised that if he wanted to change his life, he needed to change his daily life first – get up at six o’clock instead of seven – go to bed at ten o’clock instead of eleven.

If you’re not the success you want to be, your life is not going to change without you doing something practical about it. If your life doesn’t turn you on, you’re doing something wrong – you’re going to have to do something right instead. You’re going to have to find a way to turn yourself on – to focus your attention in the here and now – so that you will stop paying attention to useless thought and so that your subconscious will stop tripping up your today by focusing on your yesterdays. Your success – your effortless success – is entirely within your own control – but you’re going to have to act.

Copyright © 2009 Willie Horton

Willie Horton’s acclaimed two-day personal development seminars have been running for thirteen years. He teaches that a clear and present state of mind creates extra-ordinary personal and business success. His vast expertise is now available in his Online Workshop at Gurdy.Net. His website also offers daily free personal development video seminars, articles and a Free Personal Development Ezine published every Monday morning.

Facing The Fear And Anxiety Of The Unknown

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By Stanley Popovich

Almost everybody worries about what will happen in the future. The prospect of not knowing if something good or bad will happen to you in the near future can produce a lot of fear and anxiety. As a result, here is a list of techniques and suggestions on how to manage this fear of dealing with the unknown.

Remember that no one can predict the future with one hundred percent certainty. Even if the thing that you feared does happen there are circumstances and factors that you can’t predict which can be used to your advantage. For instance, let’s say at your place of work that you miss the deadline for a project you have been working on for the last few months. Everything you feared is coming true. Suddenly, your boss comes to your office and tells you that the deadline is extended and that he forgot to tell you the day before. This unknown factor changes everything. Remember: we may be ninety-nine percent correct in predicting the future, but all it takes is for that one percent to make a world of difference.

Learn to take it one day at a time. Instead of worrying about how you will get through the rest of the week or coming month, try to focus on today. Each day can provide us with different opportunities to learn new things and that includes learning how to deal with your problems. When the time comes, hopefully you will have learned the skills to deal with your situation.

Sometimes, we can get anxious over a task that we will have to perform in the near future. When this happens, visualize yourself doing the task in your mind. For instance, you and your team have to play in the championship volleyball game in front of a large group of people in the next few days. Before the big day comes, imagine yourself playing the game in your mind. Imagine that you’re playing in front of a large audience. By playing the game in your mind, you will be better prepared to perform for real when the time comes. Self-Visualization is a great way to reduce the fear and stress of a coming situation and increase your self-confidence.

Remember take a deep breathe and try to find something to do to get your mind off of your anxieties and stresses. A person could take a walk, listen to some music, read the newspaper, watch TV, play on the computer or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things. This will distract you from your current worries.


A lot of times, our worrying can make the problem even worse. All the worrying in the world will not change anything. All you can do is to do your best each day, hope for the best, and when something does happen, take it in stride. If you still have trouble managing your anxiety of the future, then talking to a counselor or clergyman can be of great help.

There are ways to help manage your fear and all it takes is some effort to find those answers.

Stan Popovich is the author of “A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear Using Psychology, Christianity and Non Resistant Methods” – an easy to read book that presents a general overview of techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears and anxieties. For additional information go to: http://www.managingfear.com/

How to Listen Intently

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638482_the_secret_bench_of_knowledge_4I was raised in a family where communication circled around but never went directly to the source. If my mother wanted to know something about my brother, she’d ask my sister; if she wanted to know something about my sister, she’d come to me, and so on. Judging from the frequency in which I see this evasive communication style in business and elsewhere, I assume that I was not the only one raised in this manner.

Here are some examples of evasive communication:

1. Phil believes that an associate is interfering with his project to gain headway with the CEO. What should he do? What strategy will insure his ultimate success?

2. Tiffany is certain that her new in-laws judge everything she says and does and that their criticism will bring disaster to her marriage.

3. Matthew blew his presentation. He is positive of it, and will shy away from the spotlight in the future to avoid such humiliation.

No one is sabotaging these three individuals except themselves. All they have to do is change their focus, get curious, and ask some questions. Sound simple?

1. Change their focus. All three have their eye and thoughts on the ill fated results of loss or embarrassment. What you think about is what you create. Each is unwittingly creating failure. However, if Phil changes his focus to amazing his CEO with diligence and creativity, what results will he then produce? Be aware of competition, but don’t let it adversely affect you.

2. Get curious. Tiffany notices her in-laws watching her closely. Are they really judging her? Are they perhaps eager to learn more about her through her actions and behavior? Is this more about Tiffany’s lack of confidence? Perhaps they’ve never seen a tennis match played or table set the way she does and they are enamored! What will this curiosity open up to her?

3. Ask the question: Truly, the only way to know something for certain is to ask. Why do we shy away from going to the source? Chances are high that if Matthew asks for feedback on his presentation, he’ll learn how to fine tune it; if Tiffany or Phil ask directly, they’ll gain valuable information as well.

A method of listening in the coaching world is called ‘level three listening.’ This is listening with all of your senses—your eyes, ears, intuition, gut. Listen to what is really being said and what is not. This intense listening leads to intriguing questions which will result in greater understanding. Seek first to understand before being understood. Dare to ask the questions you’ve held back on.

Go directly to the source. This is never actually as difficult as it may initially seem. Additionally, asking the question saves time and energy; makes things much clearer and in the long run saves relationships. Even the most intuitive of us never knows where the other is coming from without an open discussion. Even then, watch for signs. Have a wonderful week and enjoy your discoveries!

For the sake of keeping your career fresh and on track, would you like to enjoy a weekly shot-in-the-arm from Master Certified Coach Ann Golden Eglé? You can sign up for her Success Thought of the Week at http://www.gvsuccess.com .

Does Dieting Motivation Work?

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1165337_broccoliI’ve been kicking this term “dieting motivation” around my brain for awhile now. I’ve got to be honest (as I strive to annoyingly remain!), every time this phrase comes to mind, I sortof cringe and shrivel up inside. “Dieting Motivation” invokes thoughts of denial, suffering, and heartbreak.

In general, I’m totally against using the term dieting at all. I guess because I’m constantly preaching “lifestyle” which is diametrically opposed to “dieting” in my mind. Adding motivation to the mix just doubles my depression. Ugh. I have to diet AND be motivated? No, sorry, that really doesn’t sound like me. I think I’ll pass.

Personally, I’m the type of person who’d rather exercise more and watch my calories less. There’s nothing wrong with that. But I realize there may be a few of you out there who don’t agree with this philosophy. And that’s ok, too. But then you have to come to terms with the fact that you will need to make changes in what you eat, how much you eat certain items, and how you feel about eating.



“How I feel about eating”? What?! I know it may sound crazy but especially us Americans, we eat more as a recreational event, as entertainment. We’ve long since disconnected with the fact that the act of eating is to fulfill a need of our body. And the fuel you use to stoke your body’s energetic fire makes a huge difference in how you feel and deal with plenty of seemingly unrelated issues in your life. Being a healthy eater can impact EVERY, EVERY, EVERY area of your life. Because it’s influencing how you feel, your emotions, your energy level…

People are always so focused on weight loss. And yes, I realize that is the focal point of my business, HOWEVER, there is such a struggle mentality surrounding weight loss success. And I think that if more people would begin to focus on general health and well-being, weight loss would be a happy side effect.

So, I guess that dieting motivation is really going to have to reach a deeper level of your existence in order to be effective. Just weight loss? Well, you’ve got to investigate the why’s of that desire. Knowing you SHOULD lose weight is not enough. You must reach deep down and find a true motivation that will carry you through tough times. When you’ve had a really bad day and just want to drown yourself in (fill-in-the-blank with your preferred diet destroyer), you’ve got to be able to pull yourself up out of that with a vision that’s more powerful. Inspiring your kids maybe. You have to find the precise motivation that will work for you.

Jennifer is a caring, real-world weight loss coach, specializing in assisting busy women with quick and easy weight loss. If you have tried every diet gimmick and exercise program with little to no lasting success, check out the $176 gift certificate at http://www.quick-weight-loss-success.com