I’m cooking new things in my world about which I feel excited and energised. However, I also feel shaky and sometimes downright scared at the same time! What me? Ooooh yes! What if I mess up? What if people don’t like what I do? Or even… what if I succeed? No, not that! What will I do then?

And once upon a time those feelings would have deterred me. Once upon a time I would have, and indeed did, create excuses for not doing what I wanted to do because I was so frightened by the prospect of doing it. I sometimes even used my ex-husband as an excuse because, for sure, he disapproved of many of the things I already did. Hence the ‘ex’!

Anyhow, at first I would beat myself up for making excuses and not having the courage to take opportunities. Then I began to be more compassionate with myself. I realised I needed a new take on what ‘shaky and sometimes downright scared’ meant.

And my new point of view? I suddenly realised that every time you challenge yourself, every time you go for the stretch or raise the bar, of course it’s going to be scary. How could it not be?

There you are stepping into unchartered waters and, like the first day at kindergarten or primary school, taking the plunge gives you the collywobbles. You wouldn’t be human if it didn’t.

And being human is not an excuse for not challenging yourself to be more of who you can be! To joggle my quote a bit… if you have the desire, passion and enthusiasm to do something, nothing in the world will stop you… EXCEPT YOU!

What are a few sleepless nights? What’s a bit of anxiety whether about failure or success… or even both? And in my case, what are a few ‘bag lady’ fears? If the choice is do or not do and the ‘do’ is part of your purpose, passion and power, GO DO IT… even if you wet yourself in the process!

More easily said than done? I don’t think so. Here are some essential tips to help you on your way.

***#1 Remember… the thing that you want to do has importance for you.*** You don’t get scared by doing same old same old, do you? So tell yourself your fears are your friends. They’re telling you how very much what you want to do matters to you.

***#2 Take time to picture what your life will be like when you’ve achieved what you want to do.*** See yourself in your picture and notice how great you look, sound and feel and how other people respond so positively to you…. and give out a loud ‘victory’ call. Yaaaaay!

***#3 Record your picture in any way you want…*** writing, drawing, painting, music, a collage. Refer to your record any time you get scared and remind yourself of your delicious life ahead and how very goooood you’re going to feel.

***#4 Confide only in friends who will love, support and encourage you on your journey.*** Some people are only happy for you to slip on banana skins. Avoid them like the plague!

#5 And whether your self-challenge is decorating a room, taking a course, learning to swim, starting a company, climbing Mount Everest or running a charity stall… When you’ve actually raised your bar ***CELEBRATE big time!*** In fact, celebrate each and every new step you take along the way!

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A lack of skill, ability and experience in certain business areas need not be a barrier to success and starting your own business. The personal qualities exerted by a small business owner overcoming deficiencies over and over again are vital and present in many entrepreneurs much more so that specific technical knowledge.

Not everyone is a master of all business attributes in fact very few are. Certainly being a master of all is a fantastic position but unrealistic while certain personal qualities are essential to fight the inevitable battles to come. Business battles the successful entrepreneur wins.

Businesses that have grown and become medium sized and bigger are not reliant on the business owner entirely. Employees are engaged with specialist skills and abilities to develop and grow the business. A sole trader just starting out has to settle for a comfortable living or have the ability to grow the business to the point where more specialist abilities can be added to the business.

Most small business owners who start a new business do so in an area where that small business owner has some knowledge, experience and skill. It is a natural progression having acquired the business knowledge and experience to use those abilities to build the business under self employment rules rather than earn profits for an employer.

The personal qualities a small business owner possesses are more likely to determine the level of success. Abilities such as hard work, determination, persistence, intuition, tolerance and aggression can be the bedrock of success. But the road to success is not all slam wham bang for the entrepreneur. Small business owners invariably work longer and harder than employees. An employee works for wages and an adequate work performance is enough.

A small business owner is more likely to be on the job at first light, miss the coffee and dinner break and twelve hours later announce he has to finish off for the day because he has to go home and do the business accounting books that he started on Sunday. Determination and persistence go hand in glove with success. Every new business runs into problems at some time or reaches a stage where the business owner needs to be completely focused and stick with a strategy to make the plans work.

Things go wrong from time to time; its normal, determination and persistence are valuable qualities to see through these times. Aggression in forcing through a business plan may sometimes be the only viable option. Not physical violence but the heightened state of anxiety to push through the plan and make it work with controlled aggression and passion. On the other side of the coin there will be times when the small business owner has to exercise tolerance and just go with the flow.

Many small start up businesses go out of business within 2 to 3 years of starting a new business. A major cause is under capitalisation which basically means they run out of money. Liquidity is a major area of concern for every small business entrepreneur and a cautious approach to a new business can be of considerable value.

There is a strong tendency for a new business start up to borrow money and buy new equipment just to get started. Such businesses are taking a major risk the plans will work. Some plans do work but rarely it is a smooth path and a better option is to build the business and reinvest profits made.

A more cautious approach would be to start a new business without borrowing substantial funds because if the small business owner has the ability to make a success of the business and make money then they can usually do so without external funding and use the profits made to build the business in the future.

The sound reason for a small business or a start up business to borrow money is to already be showing a good financial performance and use extra funds to speed up future success while borrowing funds with no track record is a gamble and a gamble which fails only too often.

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This latest book, “The Art of Power,” written in Thich’s 90th decade, is honest and gets to the heart of what ails human kind in the beginning of the 21st century.

The book also addresses what can set us free.

The powers that Thich refers to are five in number.

1) The power of faith; this power is rooted as a confidence you develop within yourself that you have the capacity to be a Buddha, Christ or Krishna. You have the power to transform and to heal.

You develop a path to follow and you stay on it. You bring others with you who have the desire to follow the same path.

The path is a metaphor for a strong faith that where you are going is exactly where you are meant to go.

2) The power of diligence; This power refers to the act of returning to our best and our highest selves, by nurturing those seeds that bloom with love, compassion and patience.

When negative vibrations arise, we do not water those seeds. We learn to stop them in their tracks, by nurturing instead the best we have to offer.

Thich suggests that we do not watch violent TV, movies or belabor the negativity that appears to be happening in the world.

We must be careful not to give these vibrations a chance to flower and take over consciousness.

This requires diligence and a community of like minded people to help guide the process.

Skillfulness in this way creates mindfulness, or living in the present moment, called true diligence, in the Buddhist tradition.

3) The power of mindfulness; or the art of living in the present moment. Every act, whether it be washing a dish, lifting a block to build a wall, shoveling sand and rock to mix with cement to hold the wall together, all of these things done with full awareness bring a different energy to the mind.

The art of full awareness, or the power of mindfulness, is a practice which can be perfected, as described in the Eckhart Tolle/Oprah Webinar.

Sitting with what is, accepting it, breathing into it, brings tremendous relief to the mind and to the heart.

Thich and Eckart Tolle are mindfulness practitioners and they both look ageless. Tolle told Oprah on the final webinar that when you live deeply in the here and now, you age more slowly. (Tolle is 60). These two men are certainly testaments to that!

4) The power of concentration; When we drink our tea, walk to the laundry room, fold the wash; these take great concentration to hold on to the second at hand and not think about the past, what needs to be done, who needs to be called.

Slowing down and reflecting on the truths of life such as we are all connected, that our loved ones will die, and we will also die makes it starkly clear that all things in the physical dimension pass away and are created again.

Thus we concentrate on savoring the moments we have with our loved ones, allowing those times to be focused and fully appreciated.

5) The power of insight; By using the power of concentration, insights arise that allow you to unravel the meanings and revelations of life and its lessons.

For instance, the insight regarding the fact that all of us will die one day leads to the insight and revelation that we must cherish the time that we have, in this present moment.

Thich says that the grief felt at the time of a loved one’s passing can be attributed to the lack of in the moment caring, of time we really listened to and saw that person as they really were.

We may grieve the fact that we never took the time to really be with him or her.

The Buddhists call this constant changing reality we all live in “impermanence.”

The beauty of impermanence is that with every breath, we have the opportunity to begin anew. If we have been negligent in truly taking the time to be with the ones we love, then we can be with them now. Or if we have been negligent in taking care of ourselves, the insight that arises from practicing all five powers naturally propels us to take care of ourselves now.

The Buddhist philosophy is beautifully explained in Thich’s book. Thich outlines all aspects of Buddhism, and the simplicity of the teaching makes it very possible to understand.

This is one thing that makes the book a rarity.

Thich also takes the 21st century person to task. For instance, in the part about the “Five Mindfulness Training,” he tells us to watch our words, watch what we eat and tells us not to drink alcohol.

He tells us to love ourselves exactly as we are, and admonishes those who get cosmetic surgery.

Naturally, as a person who experienced the worst blood baths of the 20th century, the Vietnam War, he admonishes all acts of war.

As must we, if we hope to achieve the depth of understanding that arises when people work together and strive to develop compassion for one another.

We are not developing compassion when we numb our senses with alcohol and other drugs, nor can we be compassion when killing other humans in the name of war.

Thich also discusses the 3 Virtues:

1) The virtue of cutting off: What are we cutting off? Our anger, fear and delusion. Another way of saying cutting off is to let go and in the process, transform these negative emotions to a higher vibrational field.

2) The virtue of loving: When you offer care and respect as diametrically opposed to scolding or shouting at a person, you naturally gain respect and people are drawn to you.

3) The virtue of insight: This virtue is gained by looking deeply, not running away from pain and sorrow. By developing this virtue, difficulties and tensions are easily resolved.

By practicing the 5 powers and 3 virtues, spiritual authority results. An inner peace, a balanced calm is established. A natural tendency to help others is formed.

My favorite admonishment of Thich’s is: we must learn to uni-task and stop the multi- tasking that our society has condoned. We may speak on the phone, watch TV, all the while running a computer program.

Or we will text message a person when we really should be focused 100% on the person sitting across the table from us. This ability to do many tasks at once also has a numbing effect on the psyche. We may forget to rest, to listen to bird song, or tune into our own breathing.

The Art of Power By Thich Naht Hahn is my favorite of all his prolific books. The Tell It Like It Is, straight from the heart wisdom style of this book, was a wake up call.

This is a book to further transform the self.

It will change your life.

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The MBTI is extensively used for leadership development training and coaching in companies all over the world. Based on psychologist Carl Jung’s theory of personality types, for more than 50 years it has been the most widely used psychometric instrument for understanding normal personality differences.

How does the MBTI work?

The MBTI identifies your natural preferences in four areas or dichotomies:

1.Where you get your energy from

Extraversion(E) the external world of people, activities and things; or Introversion (I) the inner world or ideas and experiences

2. How you take in information

Sensing (S) a focus on facts and present reality; or Intuition (N) a focus on patterns and future possibilities

3.How you make decisions

Thinking (T) using objective logic; or Feeling(F) subjective and values based

4.Preferred lifestyle

Judging(J) Planned, organised, liking things settled; or Perceiving(P) Flexible, spontaneous, keeping options open

This yields 16 possible personality type combinations.

Is there a “Leadership Type”?

It is simplistic to label any one category as a “leader type,” for various reasons

1.We are more than our personality type. The MBTI does not measure factors such as intellectual ability, emotional intelligence, or skill level – all of which would impact on a person’s potential for leadership.

2. Different types have different strengths, all of which can be important in a leadership role.

3. We are not “boxed in” by our type. MBTI theory holds that whilst our underlying type does not change, as we mature we develop the non preferred parts of our personality and so become equipped with a wider choice of behaviours. This development is both a natural process and something which we can cultivate consciously.

Interestingly however, research across different countries has consistently shown that Thinking and Judging (TJ) types are the most frequently occurring in managers and leaders. Kirby, 1997 notes that because these types are so prevalent, it may be that “Thinking and Judging behaviours have become the accepted definition of what it means to lead, and therefore, people displaying these behaviours are seen as ‘leadership material.’”

Leadership strengths associated with Thinking-Judging include a focus on creating order, structures and processes, use of logical reasoning to analyse problems, and an emphasis on competence and efficiency. However there are also potential weaknesses such as limiting creativity and flexibility, failing to include and consult with others, and a tendency to rush decisions.

It is therefore clearly unwise for any organisation to rely too heavily on a TJ management or leadership culture; fortunately this beginning to be more recognised.

What does this mean for women?

It’s significant. Thinking – Feeling (T or F) is in fact the only dichotomy which shows a gender bias. Women are more likely to report as Feeling types (75% ). In part this may be due to pressure to conform to what is considered socially desirable.

The implications for women aspiring to leadership positions within predominantly TJ organisations are obvious. According to type theory, people are most effective and fulfilled when they have identified and developed their natural strengths. In an environment which rewards TJ skills, women with different preferences may not have been given the opportunity to develop their own natural leadership style.

So how can I use personality type theory to help me be a better leader?

First, take the MBTI questionnaire with an accredited practitioner to establish your MBTI type. Once you understand your type, you can apply your learning as follows:

1. Seek opportunities which will allow you to use your strengths. If you are a Feeling type, you may find these in Human Resources, Training and Development, or client facing roles where people skills are important. But remember any type can do anything – do not feel limited by your type.

2.Recognise that the goal of healthy type development is to acquire a repertoire of skills which you can draw on as appropriate; so work on your least preferred areas as well.

3.Identify the dominant organisational culture (likely to be TJ) and work on developing your skills in these areas, particularly if these are your least preferred behaviours.

Above all, use your new knowledge as a framework for understanding and appreciating colleagues’ viewpoints and behaviour. Through understanding others you greatly increase your capacity for influence – as Blanchard states “the key to successful leadership today is influence, not authority.”

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However, with so much of our world in turmoil because of high unemployment, record high foreclosures, and rising health care costs, many people are throwing their hands up, feeling defeated, and finding it impossible to think positively.

During the last several years, millions of people have learned about the law of attraction and are applying it to their lives. The most basic element of the law of attraction is to think positively, focus your attention on what’s positive, and reject anything negative.

If you are like the majority of people, you really do want to be positive. The question in many minds is how do I control my thoughts in the midst of so much adversity?

We have come to understand through the law of attraction that we have the power within us to affect our lives by what we think….and of course we want good things! The situation many find themselves in makes it seem like we are choosing between being positive or facing reality!

How can someone who is faced with losing their home have positive thoughts?

We need to move beyond whether we think we can and address the critical issue, which is that now it is more important than ever to be positive.

For most, it has more to do with not knowing how, rather that not believing it is necessary.

The good news is that there is a method to create and maintain a positive mindset. This method is a combination of several techniques.

The first technique was written to help parents teach their children to create and maintain a positive mindset. It can easily be applied to anyone learning it for the first time.

The second technique is called Ho’oponopono. I first became aware of this as a “clearing technique” used to erase limiting beliefs by Dr. Joe Vitale in his widely acclaimed program, “The Missing Secret”.

These two techniques can be learned at any age and when used together have proven to work without fail.

At first glance this method might seem entirely too simplistic to have any real value. The reality is that it’s much like anything new when we are learning it for the first time.

The steps may be simple; the work comes in the form of self-discipline and repetition.

The first step or technique in this method is to learn to be aware of what you are thinking. Research shows, and experts agree, that we can not control what thoughts come into our minds.

With that being said, we can however, control how we react to the thoughts that enter our minds. Paying attention to your thoughts puts you in the driver’s seat.

When you find yourself having a negative thought, enter into an inner dialogue with yourself and say STOP! We don’t have to accept every thought that seeps into our minds!

Once you have recognized the negative thought and took control by refusing it by using the word STOP, you have now put yourself in a place of power to CHOOSE what you will think next. You have the control.

Children have found it helpful to visualize a stop sign or if their negative thought is accompanied by a visual, they imagine a circle around the negative image with a bold red line through it, similar to road signs.

Once you have gained the control in your mind and are now able to consciously choose your next thought, the second step or technique is to replace the negative thought with a positive thought.

This can be done in two ways. The first is to replace the negative thought with a positive thought that you create that is directly in opposition to the negative thought.

For example:

Negative thought: What if I can’t pay my bills? Positive thought: All my needs are met.

Negative thought: I hate her for hurting my feelings. Positive thought: I forgive her.

The second is to use Ho’oponopono.

Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian method that Dr. Vitale learned about from therapist Dr. Hew Lin. According to Dr. Lin, its purpose is to return us back to a place of love in every moment by accepting 100 % responsibility for creating what is in our life.

Although I highly recommend reading Dr.Vitale’s book, “Zero Limits” to gain a full understanding of Ho’oponopono, based on my experience and research, I have found that using the Ho’oponopono method is effective without a great deal of in-depth understanding.

If you find yourself struggling to find a positive thought to replace the negative thought you have discarded, I suggest implementing the practice of Ho’oponopono by reciting the following:

I am sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.

These words are said as a replacement for the negative thought. They are not necessarily directed to anyone in particular.

When being used as a replacement for a negative thought, reciting these words works to reset your thoughts back to a positive mindset.

Whether you replace a negative thought with a positive thought that you create or you recite the Ho’oponopono verse, you have obtained your goal of achieving a positive mindset.

As this method is repeated a few times, you will find it becomes automatic and will happen with little or no effort, much like riding a bicycle or driving a car.

The results of being aware of your thoughts, choosing to accept only the positive thoughts, and discarding the negative ones will bring you what the law of attraction promises….more positive.

For more information and insights click on: =>http://www.InnovativeParentingLLC.com

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In every economic downturn, there are winners as well as losers. The difference is what you do with what you have to work with. This downturn is so extreme that temporary lay-offs, furloughs, and reduced hours are now all too familiar elements of the employment landscape. We can get a lot more out of them than the cost savings.

At the moment, these strategies are a way to deal with the reality that there’s not enough work to go around. But they set the stage for something we’ve needed to change for a long time. They are helping us let go of the assumption that every job has to be an 8 to 5, all day every day effort at a location determined by the company.

Yes, the assorted reductions and changes in work arrangements are needed for the cost savings right now. But wring all you can out of the experience on a deeper and broader basis. They are offering a window into how work might be better shaped even in good times. The winners will use that window to see the future.

Why? Three cultural changes are moving quietly into the forefront that will make new approaches to work design a key part of any company’s success once the economy swings back into the growth part of the cycle.

DEATH OF THE “CAREER MYSTIQUE”

The “career mystique” refers to the pact between employee and company that’s been entrenched since the 1950′s. In that scenario, employees sacrificed family life and personal pursuits for the company with the expectation that pay increases and advancement would follow. “Work” had the highest priority and the company usually got more than a forty-hour workweek from committed employees in anticipation of “future” benefits—like promotions.

Company loyalty has been waning since the first mass layoffs in the 1980′s, but the immensity and breadth of the current round is giving it a giant shove. Why give up the rest of your life for an outfit that might let you go tomorrow? Why put all your efforts into a company that might go under and suck your 401(k) along with it? Employee loyalty will need to be built on more than maybe’s from here on.

BOOMER RETIREMENTS

The numbers don’t lie. There are 78 million baby boomers followed by 40 million Gen X’ers. Even with 70 million in the Gen Y population after that, getting the work done will mean coaxing some of those boomers to stay in the workforce into their seventies and beyond.

In a 2005 study by Merrill Lynch, 83% of the 2300+ boomers surveyed said they expected to work in retirement. But only 16% wanted to work a traditional full-time job. Some want to start their own businesses and some want traditional part-time work, but the surprising number is that 42% want to cycle in and out of work. We don’t have it designed that way now. But companies who can find ways to offer that to talented older workers will have a competitive edge when the economy heats up again.

GEN Y EXPECTATIONS

Before the economy went into this swan dive, employers were worrying about how to attract the brightest and best of Gen Y. This generation has been more insistent on work/life balance in their employment choices from the get-go. The “fresh new idea” was the Results Only Work Environment, where as long as the work got accomplished timely, the employer didn’t dictate when and where it got done.

Knowledge workers can literally take the job on the road and do it perfectly well. All three generations would gain from that flexibility. But it would be nice if employers could test the arrangement before they committed to it whole hog. Same deal with other work design innovations.

What’s going on because of the downturn gives you opportunities to experiment with unique ways to shape work. Everyone accepts the need for reduced hours. Why not shape those reduced hours to create lifestyle benefits that enhance your value as an employer when the economy improves?

The cost of space for each worker is in play, too. How many of your employees could work at home? What kind of facility costs savings could result? Fewer lights on at the office and fewer commuters on the road are good for the environment, too. This is the time to explore without having to commit to anything permanently.

These are just a few examples from what could be an incredibly informative field laboratory on work design. What your company tries—and learns now–can pave the way for keeping needed talent in the fold later.

Copyright © 2009 Mary Lloyd

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Look in any bookstore and you can find hundreds of books claiming to contain the secrets of success. And each has some valuable insights to pass on. But I see too many people who are using other people’s standards to quantify their success. Anyone using other people’s definitions of success is in danger of either being unable to attain the heights set for them by others, or else being left unsatisfied by a specific achievement because it really doesn’t fit with their own deep seated (and possibly unexplored) wants and needs.

Everyone has a different vision of what success is. The ingredients and the recipe simply cannot be found in other people’s experiences. Having said that, there are skills we can learn which will help us determine what our true ambitions in life are, and how we can best achieve them.

Reading the biography of someone we look up to might inspire us. Being exposed to a high-achiever’s “go-getter” attitude can make us realize that we are capable of having, being and doing more than we previously thought possible.

It is so important to give yourself time to read. Not just work-related “information” stuff, or, heaven forbid, a newspaper (you’ll rarely find anything very inspirational there). Allow yourself the time to read a self-help book that appeals to you. Just don’t become a self-help book addict! You see, the answers to your life questions are inside you – maybe deep inside, buried in your subconscious. A good self-help book just helps you realize which questions you need to ask yourself, and then how to work out the answers.

It’s the unasked questions which are responsible for making you feel uncomfortable or incomplete, or restless. Once you have your question (where do I want to go?), you are in a position to work on the answer (the destination).

Any self-help book should be seen as a guide, not an action plan. One way to view a guide is as a map with all the roads, rivers, mountains and points of interest clearly marked. You can choose where to travel, and how. Lets say you choose to go in your car. Along the way, you might have to take a detour or follow a dirt track for a while – but you are making progress, albeit in a round about way. Your guide (the map), shows you alternative routes. You just refer to it as and when you need it. An action plan can be seen more like a train journey. There is a list of possible destinations, but these are limited, since not everywhere has a railway station. Once you get on the train, the journey is out of your hands. You are simply taken along according to the timetable. You are subject to whatever delays the train may encounter – and you are no longer in control of how you get to your destination. Your only option in this “action plan” analogy is – you can get off the train. You then have to try a different method to get where you want to go. But the action plan is now redundant. So, taking the view that a self help book is only a guide – not an action plan – ensures you create your own definition of success – and that you achieve it on your own terms!

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